Editing Strategy: Think of the Overall Tone

The overall tone of a document can enhance or destroy it.

The example below was written by the Dean of Students at a prestigious university, advising professors of the unfortunate death of a student.  Everything is correct, technically speaking, except the resulting tone.

To all instructors of Mary Smith:

This is to inform you of the death of Mary Smith who was killed in an automobile accident last Saturday night.  Please remove her name from your class lists.

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